one.

i have been writing since i can remember.

all i have ever had, was my words. since the night before Michael got home, i had written almost 30 thousand words in my previous blog. i do not want to total up how many i have written in my blogger blogs from the last year and a half of my life. since the sixth grade, i have kept a handwritten journal, i have written poetry, and stories, and parts of my life. in notebook, on blogs, in pen, in pencil, in books that ask me questions, in a notebook filled with my husband and i's memories. i read words, everyday, in books. words, are everywhere. and mine, will never be taken away from me.

last night as i was sitting in the bathtub, unwinding from the terrible day i had. i wondered what my life would be like if i was a mute. if i had those words, but couldn't use them. what if, i was blind, and couldnt read words. what if some crazy thing happened, and i ran out of words. i could not imagine my life without speaking, writing, or reading. in the last few years, words have become me. they are in every fiber of my being. every happy moment, or sad moment, every fight, joy, sadness. they all have words. and who is anyone in this world, to take that away from me? ever? not yesterday, or tomorrow, or next year. i will continue to write, for the rest of my life. i refuse to stop. i am not weak, nor am i afraid. i have never been afraid, and never will i ever be again. 

i refuse to let someone, as ignorant as lindsay or her friends, or my in laws, or anyone else in this world, tell me, or threaten me into stopping writing. i got multiple messages yesterday, and posts on my Facebook, asking me not to delete my blog. that i have made too much of an impact on other lives, that i was an inspiration, that people needed my words. how can i let so many people down, by not writing any longer? i just can't.

it doesn't matter how many times i have to delete and restart my blogs. by gosh, i'm going to do it. and it isn't even for myself anymore. it's for everyone else that counts on me, my words, my experiences, and life. everyday, and all the time. <3

have at it. :)

-ks.