thirty two.

as much as i hate fighting with that buttface.
letting it all out at once, or even in a week. does us a world of good.
this morning was like nothing happened. he made me bacon in bed and we took a shower. he told me he would take me back to Michaels and anywhere else i had wanted to go yesterday. we got crafty things to make Lyvi's bow holder and got Chipotle for lunch. then i told him i wanted to take Ryder to a park so he can play. we went to this beautiful one by the mall. there was grass EVERYWHERE! so we just let Ryder crawl around and giggle, and wonder what the heck it was that he was crawling on.
i, being the gymnast that i am, had to try to do a roundoff back handspring just to see if i could. at 18 weeks pregnant, that answer is yes. we just walked around, talking. Ryder sitting on his dad's shoulders. and decided that when my camera comes in, we will come back and have a picnic and spend the day there. i have a ton of photo ideas, so, i'm pretty excited. as much as i can't stand Mike and he upsets me with parenting, seeing them together and how happy he makes my little boy, just kind of blows things out of the water. we even talked about his mom coming to visit. she will be here on April 18th and staying until the 23rd. no Tiffany, and i think it will be alright this time.
he even stopped at a thrift store after the park knowing i would want to look for books. it isn't a good day outside of twentynine unless i find some good books. and boy did i! they had a sale going on and there were books for .$50! i ended up with 19 books for less than $13. i was like a little kid in a candy store. and i still love that Mike keeps Ryder occupied while mommy hunts. it's just such a nice little thing i get to do for myself once in awhile.
on the drive home, we actually talked. we talked about what's going to happen when we get out of the marine corps and where he wants to work, and where i want to work. just, hoping to get everything sorted out before we actually leave here. we talked about my old job and how he use to visit me. he would see me in MY uniform, and he didn't have a job. then he decided to play Marine and i quit my job, to visit HIM in uniform. it was kind of a cute concept that he himself brought up. we sang Rascal Flatts, and anyone that knew my husband before knows that's a big thing. and when he got home he started putting the bookshelf we bought over a month ago together for me, and when that was finished he told me to fill it up and he went downstairs and cleaned. and he actually laid in Ryder's crib comforting and snuggling him to sleep, even if it was a new nights too late.
and i have to say that i am proud of my bookshelf. it's a tall six footer with five shelves and it is absolutely filled with books. i have a smaller bookshelf half the size, filled with hardcovers. and it leaves me with an empty small bookshelf! which makes me happy because we all know what that means, MORE BOOKS!  though i have a lot of catching up to do, i have about 200 unread books waiting for me. :)
things aren't all okay, seeing as what a rough week he had, but things seem to be better. or maybe i was just too exhausted to fight anymore.

but this weekend now is just all about relaxing. i know i will get to sleep in tomorrow and all my school work is finished for the week. i get to lounge around with my husband and son, and read more into my current book! i'm glad he treated me out to a good day and was who i needed him to be, even though i haven't been the nicest person in the last week.

it seems like when we have the biggest blow outs, it helps us the most. the weeks i just want to give up, he starts to change. and it isn't like he's just changing to make me happy. he listens for once, and picks things up, little hints. and its a good few weeks before he slips up again, right when i'm finally over the last fight and "big things" it starts all over again. but today we were able to laugh and enjoy the day with our prefect little baby boy. and for that simple fact, of the smile on Ryder's face because of both Mommy and Daddy, everything was worth it.