twenty four.

every morning.
i wake up before i really want to.
and i spend the day.
changing a dirty butt, cleaning up toys, chasing my son around, i pick up the same things over and over, the things he isn't suppose to play with. i run to the same spot, where he isn't suppose to be, a thousand times a day and bring him back to his play area. just to see his backside of him crawling away again. i wash bottles every other night, and clothes every weekend, and have to fold them and put them all away all over again. i chase his binkies and toys around stores when he throws them from his stroller. i always have an extra one in my pocket, just in case. theres snacks in the car, at all times. as well as one of his blankets. i know his favorite songs to sing, and teach him new things. i pick out his clothes and shoes, that he rarely even keeps on. i deal with baby melt downs and owies, and ackies and by the end of the day, i'm exhausted.

but it never fails. i always tip toe into his room and watch that little boy sleep, multiple times a night. i miss him so much when he's in the next room. i love watching his breathing, that pouty little mouth opening and closing. him stretching to get comfortable. i just want to wrap him up and keep him this little forever. my precious little innocent baby. that i love so much!

and now, i'm going to add another to the everyday life.
exhaustion or not.
i wouldn't have my life any other way.

the best thing i ever did was marry that crazy man and get pregnant. i have no regrets with any road that has led to my children. though Ryder and Lyvia are only going to be 18 months apart, it only means they will grow up together as best friends. i get so many weird looks when they see me holding Ry and i say i'm pregnant again. but it doesn't bother me anymore. nothing does. the best thing i ever did was give birth to that little boy, and this little girl in august.

truth is.
i honestly can't wait for the nights where Mike ends up on the floor and i am half hanging off the bed because the kids are taking over during a thunderstorm. kissing away tears at boo boo's. picking them up from school to hear all about their days, the jibber jabber of two little kids talking over one another. the run around of sports and ballet classes. (so excited i get to say this now!) it's going to be wonderful. the best life i have ever lived, is with my children.

almost every girl in the world wants to fall in love with a guy, get married, and have babies. and i see so many girls i went to high school with searching in all the wrong places. they post photos of them constantly getting drunk, partying, being sleezy. who really wants that life!? i fall in love more and more everyday with my husband that i married young, after knowing him only 9 months. and i fall in love with our son multiple times a day, and will our daughter as well. no more searching, or heartbreak, or hurt when he doesn't call me the next morning. i have it. i have it all. everyday and all the time.
our perfect little family of four.

yes, i'm the lucky one.

-ks.